As a parent we hope that everyone will see the best in our kids. Just as we struggle to find it ourselves sometimes. We can feel confident that those who know our families, know our children well enough, but what about those who don’t know us? What about those people who base their idea of who our children are just by looking at them?
I know that having a biracial child is a topic of conversation. I know people have wondered and even asked -what he is “mixed with”? who are his biological parents? and where he “came from”. As my child grows up in a small area where everyone knows him, I know for the most part he is treated well and loved so much. It is those outside of our little circle that I worry about.
We have experienced the looks, the evil eye that asks – who is that kid and why is he here? There are things I worry about for his future that I don’t worry about for my daughters. My daughters with their porcelain skin and bright blue eyes. The idea of white privilege is a topic I, as most white people, like to avoid. But, it is a reality.
When I think about my son’s future, I think about him asking a girl out. What if this girl’s parents do not know my son? What if they don’t know the way he was raised? In a house full of girls that he loves and respects and bends over backwards for. What if they don’t know the sensitive loving kid he is and they refuse to look beyond his skin?
We live in a world where this is his reality. Where this is our reality.
So many years later. No matter how much has changed. No matter how race relations may have improved. People are still people. You can’t change someone who doesn’t want to change.
Hoping for my son’s sake he someday finds a girl with parents who see him for who he is, not for the color of his skin.