A Letter to My Second Child: I’m Sorry

Dear Macy,

I am sorry that I don’t take every precaution with you like I did with your brother.

I am sorry that I am more laid back and less fearful. I never left his side in fear that something awful would happen if I did. With you, I know you are safe when you are on your exercise matt and I have to go to the bathroom or change my clothes for a minute or two.

When your brother was born, I used to handwash his bottles, then run them through the dishwasher, and then boil them to make sure all the bacteria was gone. With you, I’ve been known to just give your last bottle a good rinse with the faucet on hot before giving you your next bottle.

When your brother would cry, I would run to his aid like my pants were on fire to make sure everything was OK. With you, I’ve been known to finish the dishes before taking you out of your bouncer even though you’re being fussy.

You have sported so many of your brother’s blue hand-me-downs on multiple occasions because I don’t do your laundry nearly as often as I should. When your brother was born, I had time to do laundry every day, now I am lucky to get to it once or twice a week.

I would take him to the Zoo and the Museum often even though he was too little to enjoy it very much as a baby. With you, I am so tired that all I can think about when all wake up in the morning is how excited I am for nap time. Trying to entertain your brother as well as cater to your every need is very tiring and I am doing my best.

You are an amazing baby and I hope you never feel neglected or not cared for. I hope you feel my love every single day because my love for you is strong. I may do things differently with one of you than the other from time to time but my love for you both amounts to the same. You will always be my little princess and I cherish every second spent with you.

Love,

Mom

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