Talking to Children About Grief, Loss and Death: Children’s Book List {Series}

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Grief, loss and death are not the happiest of subjects and no parent looks forward to the day when they have to address this subject with their child(ren).  However, it is unavoidable.  At some point, you will find yourself struggling to explain, reassure and support your child(ren) through an experience or exposure to death.  Here at Cincinnati Moms Blog, we have several team members who are trained in child development and how to work with children who have encountered grief, loss and/or death.  This series is meant to provide some basic information about this sensitive subject.


Part Two: Children’s Book List

Grief GraphicIn the first post of this series, CMB includes a list of books specifically geared towards facilitating conversation regarding the death of a pet and/simple introductions of the topic for those first experiences of loss. You can view that post, with book suggestions HERE.

Children, 3-7 Years of Age

All book descriptions and photo credits are courtesy of Amazon.com
All book descriptions and photo credits are courtesy of Amazon.com

Badger’s Parting Gifts:: By Susan Varley

“Badger’s friends are sad when he dies but treasure the memories he left them.”

Sad Isn’t Bad: A Good-Grief Guidebook for Kids Dealing with Loss:: By Michaelene Mundy

“Loaded with positive, life-affirming advice for coping with loss as a child, this guide tells children what they need to know after a loss–that the world is still safe; life is good; and hurting hearts do mend. Written by a school counselor, this book helps comfort children facing of the worst and hardest kind of reality.”

The Empty Place: A Child’s Guide Through Grief:: By Roberta Temes

“Loaded with positive, life-affirming advice for coping with loss as a child, this guide tells children what they need to know after a loss–that the world is still safe; life is good; and hurting hearts do mend. Written by a school counselor, this book helps comfort children facing of the worst and hardest kind of reality.”

Molly’s Rosebush:: By Janice Cohn

“When the new baby they’ve been expecting isn’t strong enough to be born, Molly and her family find different ways to express their feelings and comfort each other.”

Something Happened: A Book for Children and Parents Who Have Experienced Pregnancy Loss:: By Cathy Blanford

“This beautifully illustrated, simple, clear story is designed to help a young child understand what has happened when there has been a pregnancy loss. The book addresses the sadness that a child experiences when the anticipated baby has died. The child’s fears and feelings of guilt are addressed as well as other confusing feelings.”

I Wonder What You Do On Your First Day In Heaven:: By Phoebe Welsh

“Children’s hardcover picture book. A thoughtfully written and illustrated book that offers consolation and hope to anyone who has experienced the loss of a loved one.”

Children, 7-12 Years of Age

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All book descriptions and photo credits are courtesy of Amazon.com

What on Earth Do You Do When Someone Dies?:: By Trevor Romain

“When Trevor Romain’s father died, Trevor didn’t know what to feel, say, or do. Shocked, saddened, and confused, all he could say was . . . wow. As he started understanding what had happened, he began writing about his experiences and feelings. His new book—simple, insightful, and straight from the heart—is for any child who has lost a loved one or other special person. Trevor talks directly to kids about what death means and how to cope. He asks the kinds of questions kids have about death—Why? How? What next? Is it my fault? What’s a funeral?—in basic, straightforward terms. He describes and discusses the overwhelming emotions involved in grieving—sadness, fear, anger, guilt—and offers practical strategies for dealing with them. He also suggests meaningful ways to remember and honor the person who has died.”

A Birthday Present for Daniel:: By Juliet Rothman

“Ellen has lost her brother, and she shares with readers just how his death has changed the way her family interacts and the way she thinks about herself and others.”

The Magic Moth:: By Virginia Lee

“This is a beautiful story of a child with a serious heart defect. Her brother doesn’t understand just what that means. He tries to cheer her up with little things he brings her to her room such as a pretty rock, or a brilliant red and green caterpillar which weaves a cocoon in a jar. His sick sister Maryanne, enjoys his presents and would make up stories about them, which her brother liked. Then one night at dinner, he asks when she will get better and his Father decides to tell the family of five children the hard-to-accept truth; that she will never get better. When Maryanne passes away, her Father explains that as a living family who, at the end, can look forward to the future knowing that Maryanne is still a part of them, only in a different way, like the caterpiller and moth. This is a wonderful book for anyone that needs to explain death of a young child to it’s family. The drawings by Richard Cuffari are also wonderful and a real joy in conveying the story.” (Quote from reviewer, Georgie Cavitt on amazon.com)

Aarvy Aardvark Finds Hope:: By Donna O’Toole

“Our classic Read-Aloud Story for people of all ages about loving & losing, friendship & hope. Aarvy has lost his family and is filled with despair and hopelessness until a true friend helps him learn about the strengths within himself. Beautiful line drawings by Kore Loy McWhirter can be colored in. Aarvy helps us learn that: Grief is a natural healing process; Grief is emotional physical, spiritual; Grief is highly personal; Grief can connect rather than separate when experienced fully; It is OK to remember; Rituals and imagination assist healing; Friends can hold hope, witness sorrow, and assist healing.”

Always and Forever:: By Alan Durant

“When Fox dies the rest of his family are absolutely distraught. How will Mole, Otter and Hare go on without their beloved friend? But, months later, Squirrel reminds them all of how funny Fox used to be, and they realise that Fox is still there in their hearts and memories.”

Coping with Death and Grief:: By Marge Eaton Heegaard

“Discusses death as a natural occurrence, what happens when someone dies, and how to deal with feelings of loss and grief.”

We Were Gonna Have a Baby, But We Had an Angel Instead:: By Pat Schwiebert

“I had initially purchased this book to try and help my six year old after his baby sister was stillborn. He was having difficulty with the tragedy as we all were. I found the illustrations and the story itself absolutely perfect with what we were experiencing. I had not expected it to touch me as much as it did. It’s only been a little over a month since we lost our baby but I find that picking the book up and reading it over and again helps me as much as it helps him. The way the illustrator had the baby remain with the family, only as an angel, was comforting to both of us. We talk about her being an angel watching over us so the pictures helped my son see that as well. It’s heartbreaking that anyone would need this but comforting that it’s there.” (Quote from reviewer, J. Carter on amazon.com)

Adolescents, 13-18 Years of Age

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All book descriptions and photo credits are courtesy of Amazon.com

Loving Ben:: By Elizabeth Laird

“Written in a first-person narrative, Anna describes how her life and relationships change as she experiences the birth and death of her brother, who is born with hydrocephalus.”

When a Friend Dies: A Book for Teens About Grieving & Healing:: By Marilyn Gootman

The death of a friend is a wrenching event for anyone at any age. Teenagers especially need help coping with this painful loss. This sensitive book answers questions grieving teens often have, like “How should I be acting?” “Is it wrong to go to parties and have fun?” and “What if I can’t handle my grief on my own?” The advice is gentle, non-preachy, and compassionate; the author has seen her own children suffer from the death of a friend, and she knows what teens go through. The revised edition includes new quotes from teens, new resources, and new insights into losing a friend through violence. Also recommended for parents and teachers of teens who have experienced a painful loss.

The Grieving Teen: A Guide for Teenagers and Their Friends:: By Helen Fitzgerald

“In this unique and compassionate guide, renowned grief counselor Helen Fitzgerald turns her attention to the special needs of adolescents struggling with loss and gives teens the tools they need to work through their pain and grief.”

Healing Your Grieving Heart: For Teens:: By Alan Wolfelt

“With sensitivity and insight, this series offers suggestions for healing activities that can help survivors learn to express their grief and mourn naturally. Acknowledging that death is a painful, ongoing part of life, they explain how people need to slow down, turn inward, embrace their feelings of loss, and seek and accept support when a loved one dies”

Weird is Normal When Teenagers Grieve:: By Jenny Wheeler and Heidi Horsely

“Teens grieve differently from adults and often get lost in the shuffle after the death of a loved one. Weird Is Normal When Teenagers Grieve is unique because it is a self-help book for grieving teens written by an actively grieving teen. Author Jenny Lee Wheeler lost her father to cancer when she was fourteen and validates for her peers that they have the right to grieve in their own way and according to their own timetable, that their grief attacks might be different from those of adults around them, and that they aren’t going crazy if they see signs from their loved one.”

Helping Teens Cope with Death:: By The Dougy Center

“This practical guide covers the unique grief responses of teenagers and the specific challenges they face when grieving a death. You will learn how death impacts teenagers and ways that you can help them. The book also offers advice from parents and caregivers of bereaved teens on how to support adolescents and how to determine when professional help is needed.”

Teen Grief Relief:: By Heidi Horsley & Gloria Horsley

“A self-help book for grieving teenagers and their parents, written by highly credentialed, mother/daughter, international grief experts. Teenage grief is hard, lonely and painful. Parents want to know: How can I help? Teen Grief Relief provides both parents and teens with the help they need. Shared here are teen stories, feelings, techniques, references and resources for use in not only surviving but thriving after the painful loss of a family member or close personal friend. The journey can be hard and sad, but Teen Grief Relief can be a welcome and comforting companion.”

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