I am a doer, a to-do list maker. I am not a relaxer.
I take joy in crossing things off my daily, weekly, and monthly to do list. I am a homebody who likes to DIY, to make my space my own and to make it functional, organized, and beautiful. I always have a list of projects in my head or on paper that I want to do.
Imagine my surprise when my first child was born and well, that “to-do” list went out the window and instead I had one priority item: keep my baby happy, healthy, and fed. Oh, all those feedings! My daughter was born in the winter so we spent lots of time snuggling on the couch. It was glorious and something I cherish. I also, however, spent lots of time staring at the same four walls of our small condo thinking about ways to redecorate and all of the projects I didn’t have time to accomplish. I didn’t even have time to shower some days, much less paint a wall a new color.
I struggled a bit with not checking off items on my to-do list and figuring out what my new definition of productivity was.
In that first month I think I even put “shower” on my to-do list so I could maybe cross something off. It became very clear that I needed to adjust my mindset and really re-imagine my definition of the to-do list.
My daughter is now 3 and I am just a few months away from having my second baby. I still have my to-do lists and projects I want to get done but as a full-time working mom, I have learned to be realistic in my goals and how many items can really go on my to-so list. I cannot put 20 things on my to-do list and expect them to all get done. Now I try to stick to 5 and I leave room for flexibility and non-essential items to be pushed off for the next day, (sometimes the next week).
I do get restless and feel a need to “do” something at times but I have also learned to just cherish the moments. To sit and watch my daughter play, listen to her laugh and pretend with her dolls. These moments are fleeting and someday when the house is quiet and I have hours to do DIY projects and redecorate my house, I know I’ll miss these times.
So my to-do list is going to look different today. My productivity will be measured in kisses and hugs, and laughter and make believe.